Where were you guys?

I'll paint you a picture.

Me, Saturday night, Westlands outside Changes, a few cans of Redd's into my night, 
and starving.  I'm fixing for one of your Full Monty's, or a 
Breakfast Deluxe, or maybe both!

But the swanky red Rolex stand is nowhere to be found.  So I'm standing there, 
chatting with the working girls, and seriously (I mean *seriously*)
considering buying a smoky.

Guys, don't make me buy a smoky.

What's the deal?

-B.O.

Dear Barack,

Thanks for writing.

With that said, 3 emails a day is a bit much. You know what else
is too much? Double digit Rolex in a single weekend. Seriously,
Bama, you've got a country to run and Peter says you ate enough
Rolex on Thursday and Friday to last for a while.

Also, a smoky? Don't you think you're being a bit dramatic?

Finally, Chill. It's a Chapati.

See you this weekend,
Chill Micro Team

Content Review: Rolex T

Dear Rolex Team,

Thank you for publishing T-shirts on Zazzle.

Unfortunately, it appears that your product, Rolex T, contains content 
that is not suitable for printing at Zazzle.com. 

Your design contains an image or text that infringes on intellectual property rights. 
We have been contacted by the intellectual property right holder and at 
their request we will be removing your product from Zazzle’s 
Marketplace due to intellectual property claims.

We apologize for the inconvenience.

Best Regards,
Content Review Team
Zazzle Inc.

Dear Zazzle Team,

Chill. It’s a Chapati.  

Also, we’d like to speak with the people at Rolex that asked 
you to remove our Tshirt. Do you have their contact information?
Please send it along.
 
Best,
Chill Micro Team

Hot Damn

Hey guys,

I picked up a "Full Monty" today, and can I just
say... WOW.  That's the best damn chapati I've ever had.  Please
keep up the good work -- you're making one American very proud.

-Barack

p.s. - We still on for beirut tonight?

Dear Rolex customer,

Thank you for your email, but unfortunately due to the massive volume
of email we receive we are unable to respond to every message.

- The Rolex Team